Friday is my day off and I’m usually tardy to rise. My morning
companion – my computer – is quick to wake just after me. I usually check email
and skim the news before eating breakfast. On this particular Friday, the news
ate me.
After moments like this, I’m often left with more
questions than answers; more pain than hope. I listen to a nation gone angry. Panicked,
it blames everything, examines all clues, and tries to find reason in chaos. On
it goes. The news brings no answers – only more terrible stories, more grief, and
more questions.
Then I wonder what do parents ever tell their children
when something like this happens? Our reactions in these moments probably speak
louder than words. Do we grieve on Facebook? Do we get angry on Twitter? Do we
drown ourselves with media? Do we say anything at all?
Healthy talking and accurate answers need more than a
blog can hold. As simple as it sounds, we need to firmly set our faith in God’s
word in moments like these (Matthew 7:24-27). Below are answers that I need for
my own heart. I need them desperately. I pray for our parents who must live out
their faith before their children and model these hard truths. These truths will
be fleshed out in many conversations and prayers over many days. They will breathe
life when we, as parents, begin to model them… and, maybe one day, that model
will become our identity.
Why Did this Happen?
It is because of evil. God loves us so much that he lets
us choose to obey him or not. Therein lays a great mystery that the finite
cannot fathom of the infinite – why would God love man so much he would let him
sin so great? The world will try to justify with mental instability or poor
parenting and this has merit; however, we hold onto the truth that man is fallen. The fallen man
is lost in his sin and is influenced by the devil (John 8:44).
What is my
reaction?
Just as we have a choice to obey God or not, we can
choose what to be angry at. We have a choice to be angry at God and question
how he could allow this to happen. However, the road to peace lies within
choosing to be angry at sin and evil. Within Psalm 97, the Psalmist states that
those to love God will hate evil. To have a heart that burns with anger at sin
itself is to have a heart like God’s.
This is to hate murder, not the murderer. With tragedies
like this, the one who hates sins is forced to realize the severity of sin and
how great sin can be within us. When we realize that sin is evil, we realize we
are needy of forgiveness. We must face the cutting realization that we are the
ones that put Jesus on a cross as he died for us. We are the ones in need.
This is the only way that we can begin to forgive. We
forgive the murderer because we have been forgiven (Matthew 6: 14-15). This is
humanity’s path to redemption.
Why would God
allow this?
This is a very hard question. Often people have seen
horrors and they question if God could actually stop evil. However, this is to
explain evil in an all-too easy way. The hard answer is: we don’t know why God
allowed this tragedy. Isaiah 55:9 states that God’s ways are higher and we
cannot fathom his thoughts. The Psalmist often asked this question; as did Job.
Job was the first chronological book written that is in the Bible. It’s
interesting to read that its great theology is this very question. It was to
teach Israel the answer to this question. However, as we read God’s answer in
Job 40-41, we begin to see that God is God and eventually our questions melt to
worship.
Does God even
care?
The author of Hebrews states that Jesus knows and identifies
with our pains and struggles (4:15). God also draws “close to the brokenhearted
and crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18).” God’s justice will be great against all
sin (Romans 2:5).
Yet, this should prompt us to pause for thanksgiving. God’s
justice is perfect. His perfect justice and wrath is reserved for us for we are
sinners; however, it has been poured upon Jesus who took our punishment. There
will be a day where every person will be judged by God. God does care. His
wrath must be satisfied. How great will the day be when we can thank Jesus for
taking that wrath upon himself?
What hope do we
have?
Do not place hope in mankind. It is God who saves. We can
try our best with new laws and more security in our schools. What do we say to
our children because they go to school? One day they will leave our homes –
what do we say then?
“What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare
his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with
him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any
charge against those whom God has chosen? It is
God who justifies. Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that,
who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate
us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or
nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: ‘For your
sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.’
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:31-39)”
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:31-39)”
I would keep telling them that, no matter what, God loves
you and you can trust him in all things.
Some suggestions
for parents:
I got this from Booke McGlothlin’s blog on www.crosswalk.com. You may disagree with
her on some points, but I found her tips to be very helpful.
1.
Minimize media on the murders. Your children are
“deeply affected by what they see.”
2.
If your children are young, don’t tell them.
3.
Use your words carefully. Avoid using words that
sensationalize. It’s one thing to say “some children are with Jesus right now”
than to say “children were gunned down.”
4.
Make it a matter of prayer and pray with your
children. If your child is old enough, help them communicate fears, anger, and
worry to their heavenly father. Let them know that God is here and he cares.
5.
Give your children age-appropriate information
about safety. Help your child to become confident that they know what to do in
a case of an emergency.
6.
Be available for your children. Watch for sudden
silence and behavioral changes – help your child deal with grief and fear.
7.
If you feel the need, you don’t have to send
your child back to school right away. Their emotional health is much more
important.
8.
Help your child prepare going back to school by
helping your child understand that God is in control, he knows the future, and
he loves us. Even if your child is homeschooled, they won’t be under your watch
at all times. We must surrender to God and he will use all things for his
glory.
9.
Help your child trust in God’s goodness while
understanding that evil rests is in the hearts of man.
10.
Read the Bible with your child. Psalm 23;
Lamentations 3; Psalm 34:18; Isaiah 12:2; Psalm 91; John 14:1; Isaiah 26:4;
Psalm 37:3; Psalm 118:9; Proverbs 3:5
